They Are Better Than You

They are already better than you.

I'm here to help you let that painful hurdle go.

In 7th grade, I got it in my head that I wanted to play middle school sports- track, volleyball, basketball. The whole athletic buffet. This seemed reasonable to 13-year-old me.

Even then, the drive to enroll kids early in sports was in full force. I was blissfully oblivious to that reality, and better for it. The only thing I could claim was that I was athletic but had absolutely zero skills.

Most of my teammates were bigger, faster, stronger, bursting with techniques I'd never seen before.

Here's the thing about sports: you get constant feedback. You're on a team. And even if you're not as good as the rest, you're still at the table.

But oh, it felt isolating at times. The "good ones" high-fiving, setting, spiking, serving overhand like it was nothing, walking onto the court as the elect six, while I warmed the bench.

You learn a lot about yourself on the bench.

You learn if you're a quitter or not. You learn what actually motivates you versus what you think motivates you. You learn if you can accept yourself in your current state while still following your dreams. You learn if you're the type who trash-talks others to compensate for skills you don't have yet.

You learn if you can get off the bench and have the gumption to play well after that sh** show that was going on in your head.

It takes a lot of energy and focus to believe in your non-existent ability.

That same year, I decided to take up art. Maybe dabble a little. How hard could it be? I'm creative, right?

Wrong. Being creative and acquiring skills is a two-headed beast attached to the same animal.

As a nimble-minded, driven 7th grader, I was up for the challenge.

But those art classes were full of budding artists who weren't just skilled they were idea machines. Natural-born concept generators with steady hands to match.

Here's the thing about art and creating: you get little feedback when you need it most. You're typically the only one on your team. Your mindset makes or breaks you. When you are not as good as the rest, you want to eat the table or set the table on fire.

Fast-forward to my freshman year at UNT when I thought I'd "try" fine arts. Not only were they skilled artists already; they were art demi-gods.

They were so intimidating to me, I questioned my right to breathe the same studio air.

Then came portfolio review my second semester, freshman year. The professor who lived and breathed art, who smelled like he never left the studio (soooo legit) looked at my work and said emphatically:

"You should quit."

My reason for being there got real murky, real fast.

Gmail shortens emails in awkward places. Read online here. It’s better.

Let’s look at a few on the All-Star Rejected list before we continue this story.

At age 18, Disney was fired from his job at the Kansas City Star newspaper. His editor told him he "lacked imagination and had no good ideas." He was fired for being uncreative.

The Laugh-O-Gram Studio Bankruptcy (1923)

Disney's first animation company went bankrupt. Investors told him animation was "a fad" and "not a real business." He was so broke he ate dog food and slept in his office. People said he should give up on animation and get a "real job."

Mickey Mouse Rejections (1928)

When Disney pitched Mickey Mouse, he was told:

Snow White Rejections (1937)

Hollywood called his plan for a feature-length animated film "Disney's Folly." Industry executives said:

The Disneyland Rejections (1950s)

When Disney pitched his theme park idea, he was rejected by over 300 investors. They said:

The Pattern of "No Vision"

Disney he lacked talent and he lacked vision. Every revolutionary idea he had was dismissed as impossible, unmarketable, or foolish.

Despite that Disney created:

The Carrie Rejection Marathon

Stephen King submitted Carrie to 30 publishers and received 30 rejections.

The feedback was brutal and specific:

The Trash Can Moment

After rejection #30, King threw the entire manuscript into the garbage. He was done. Defeated. Ready to quit writing fiction entirely.

His wife Tabitha fished the crumpled pages out of the trash and told him:

"You've got something here. Don't give up on it."

The Breakthrough

Doubleday finally accepted Carrie - but only offered a $2,500 advance (roughly $15,000 today).

King thought that was it - a small literary novel that might sell a few thousand copies.

Then the paperback rights sold for $400,000. King's half was $200,000 - more money than he'd ever imagined.

The Earlier Rejections

Before Carrie, King had been collecting rejection slips since high school. He had a nail on his bedroom wall where he impaled every rejection letter.

By age 16, the nail could no longer hold the weight of all the rejections.

He upgraded to a railroad spike.

What They Told Him:

King, the man who has one of the most successful writing careers in history (and has sold over 350 million books worldwide), almost QUIT!

Grandma Moses (1860-1961) - Anna Mary Robertson had zero formal art training and didn't start painting until age 78 when arthritis made embroidery impossible. People dismissed her work as "amateur" and "not real art." She was told repeatedly that without training, she'd never be a serious artist. She created over 1,600 paintings and became one of America's most celebrated folk artists.

L.S. Lowry (1887-1976) - Rejected from art school multiple times and told he had "no natural ability." Critics called his industrial landscapes "amateurish" and "not worthy of exhibition." He kept painting matchstick figures and smoky cityscapes anyway, becoming one of Britain's most beloved artists.

Zora Neale Hurston (1891-1960) - Her novel Their Eyes Were Watching God was dismissed by critics as "not serious literature" and she was told to stick to folklore. She died in obscurity, working as a maid, and was buried in an unmarked grave. Now she's considered one of America's greatest writers.

Vincent van Gogh (1853-1890) - Sold exactly one painting in his entire lifetime. Critics called his work "formless, unfinished, and ugly." He lived in poverty and misery while creating what we now consider post-Impressionist masterpieces. The art world didn't recognize his genius until after his death.

Frida Kahlo (1907-1954) - Dismissed as "just Diego Rivera's wife who paints as a hobby." Critics told her to quit because her work was "too personal" and "not universal enough." She sold very few paintings in her lifetime.

Henri Rousseau (1844-1910) - Had no formal training and was mocked by critics as a "Sunday painter" with "no talent." Fellow artists called his work "childish" and "primitive." Art critics told him to stick to his day job as a toll collector. He's now considered a master of Post-Impressionist naive art.

J.K. Rowling (1965-) - Harry Potter was rejected 12 times. Publishers said it was "too long," "not marketable," and one advised her to "get a day job because you'll never make a living from writing." She was ready to quit multiple times before creating one of the most successful book series in history.

Jean-Michel Basquiat (1960-1988) - Started as a graffiti artist and was told street art wasn't "real art." Gallery owners said his work was "too raw" and "unmarketable." He faced constant racism in the art world and was often dismissed as a "primitive" artist.

Romare Bearden (1911-1988) - His collage work was dismissed as "not real painting" and he was told to stick to traditional techniques. Critics said his fragmented style was "amateur" and "unfinished." He became a pivotal figure in 20th-century American art.

Auguste Rodin (1840-1917) - Rejected three times by the École des Beaux-Arts, with examiners acknowledging his drawing skill but rejecting his sculpture as not meeting their standards. His contemporary, Jules Dalou, later told him that the school's academic training "would have killed you." Rodin called this rejection "Great good luck."

Paul Cézanne (1839-1906) - Rejected seventeen times by the Paris Salon before finally having one painting accepted in 1882. Critics dismissed his innovative approach as crude and unfinished. He is noted as saying (this is unverified) "I must work all the time, but not to arrive at the smooth finish that earns the admiration of the public.”

Claude Monet (1840-1926) - When he first revealed his Impressionist work, critics brutally derided it. His painting Impression, Sunrise was mocked as unfinished garbage. He and his family lived in severe poverty because of this rejection. His paintings didn't start selling until the 1880s.

Jackson Pollock (1912-1956) - Before his breakthrough, critics called his work "chaos" and "not real art." He was told repeatedly to learn "proper" painting techniques. Even after gaining recognition, Life magazine mockingly asked "Is he the greatest living painter in the United States?" as if it were absurd.

Lucille Ball (1911-1989) - Mocked at acting school for her Midwestern accent and told she had "two left feet" in dance classes. Her drama teacher wrote to her parents stating she was "too shy and reticent" and was "wasting her time and ours" in drama school. She became one of television's greatest comedic legends.

Oprah Winfrey (1954-) - Fired from her position as news anchor at Baltimore's WJZ-TV after less than eight months. Station management felt she was "unfit for television" due to her emotional investment in stories. Colleagues said she was "completely out of her league" and "didn't read well, didn't know news, geography, history, politics, or names."

Georges Seurat (1859-1891) - Had his innovative pointillist paintings rejected by the Paris Salon, the leading art institution of the time. This prompted him to turn away from such establishments and join independent artists, eventually revolutionizing painting technique.

Édouard Manet (1832-1883) - Repeatedly rejected by the Paris Salon and excluded from major exhibitions. His works like Olympia and The Luncheon on the Grass (Le Déjeuner sur l'herbe) were criticized for their boldness and lack of conformity to academic standards. Critics called his work scandalous and improper.

The evidence is overwhelming. Many Creators who transformed their field have been told they didn't belong there.

Rejection is imminent. What do you do when it arrives?

Here's what I know now, there will always be plenty of creators who are better than me.

And it’s the same for you.

There will always be more than enough naysayers too. At any given moment in your trajectory, there will be at least one person who makes you question everything you are plotting and hoping for. And THAT IS OK.

And once you get past those? There will be those who are merely "okay" at creating but excellent at brown-nosing. Even more humiliating.

Creating is a growing experience within yourself. It should feel uncomfortable and push you past what you believe are your limitations.

Instead of isolating yourself or beating yourself up because "they" are better, try this:

Don't give up.

Art and sports are built on fractions of seconds and tiny decisions in which you choose yourself. Believe in the transformative power of saying yes to the next step.

Remember from Issue #1…

Even from the bench.

Here are a few ways to demolish self-doubt. PDF is here.

Lucian Freud: A sumptuous single-volume edition of Phaidon's acclaimed overview of one of the greatest painters of our time.

Zora Neale Hurston: One of the most important and enduring books of the twentieth century, Their Eyes Were Watching God, brings to life a Southern love story with the wit and pathos found only in the writing of Hurston.

Edouard Manet: A lively and expert account of Edouard Manet, one of the greatest French artists, whose striking realism has led him to being called the first modern painter.

I’ve put together a list that you’ll love of creators, artists, writers, technique, mindset...dive in!

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